Thursday, October 14, 2010

The gift of friendship ...

“Friendship marks a life even more deeply than love. Love risks degenerating into obsession, friendship is never anything but sharing.” Elie Wiesel quotes (Romanian born American writer; Nobel Prize for Peace in 1986. b. 1928)

I had a friend, she was a member of my block of the month group for many years. We never met face to face, but then that's the downside to the internet. She enriched my life, none the less, and felt that I had done likewise for her, though I often wondered how.  She developed cancer, and fought courageously, but did not win.  Before she died, she called me, told me that she wanted to be my fairy godmother, and put me on the first step toward my goal of being a long arm quilter.  She packed up and shipped to me her tabletop quilting frame from the folks at Handi-Quilter. It came, and I will admit it overwhelmed me.  I was also working the better part of ten hours a day at the hospital, caring for elderly parents, and had very little time or space to devote to learning to use this gift.  SO, it got boxed up again, transported to Michigan, loaned to a friend who didn't do anything with it either, and last week it came back home to me.  Today my spouse and I figured out how to set it up, and load a quilt on it, and I took it for a test drive. Didn't do all that badly, either.  I'm looking forward to a long relationship with this thing, and to someday buying a sewing machine with a longer throat. But for now, it is enough.

Joyce's friendship was a gift. Not because of her generosity, but because of her courage in the face of adversity. She worked in a New York City's cop shop ... in fact had met the folks from Animal Planet who do critter rescue. We often talked about that.  During her illness we talked many times on the phone, and no matter how determined she was not to, I always managed to make her giggle before our conversations ended. The last time she called me, she said she "didn't know what to say to me".  She was sure she had no more laughter  left.  But before she hung up, she was laughing. That was the last time we spoke.  

I miss her. Her name is still in my outlook's contacts list.  Silly, I doubt she can get email wherever she may be now. The Lord answers knee mail, but not sure how it works with regular folks.  Some times I'm so discouraged at the prospect of finding employment that works with my physical limitations. Then I think about Joyce, and the frame, and quilting in genera, and I know I can't quit. I can't throw in the towel.  

Is there someone in your life who touched you in a way no one else ever did ... who believed in you when all you had to share were pipe dreams ...  Is there one whose friendship has marked you?  Think about it.  If there is, and I will bet there is, don't let her down. Be all that you dream of being ... stay in the game. Don't quit.   Honor that friendship.


  1. Thank you Patty for reminding me of Joyce, I miss her too. I have a friend that has been there for me. Helped me work through the loss of my mom and let me know that there is a reason for everything. She gave me support when I needed it, never asking for anything in return. She gave me love that I didn't know a friend could give and gave me hugs through emails and a special quilt from my group. Patty, you are that friend and I thank God daily for you because you are my light shining through all my darkness. Thank you for being my friend.

  2. (blush) um ... stubs toe in rug ... i'm just a plain ole ordinary rodunt ... who loves you ...